Anonymous of Holland            -A Dutchman in Korea-

    Helo welcom 2 my websight

E3 2010 Oobisoft Press Conference

So now it's time for today's last conference: Ubisoft.
As we all know, Ubisoft is a piece of shit publisher who enjoys raping PC gamers, so let's see if they even have anything you'll want to download in the first place!

Lol, this is what we saw:

Rez
[Maestro, blocky fireworks please!]

But then he started playing it and MOTHERFUCKER IT'S A NEW REZ GAME! NEW FUCKING REZ GAME MY FUCKING GOD YES FUCKING UBISOFT DOES IT AGAIN! WHAT THE COCK I AM GRINNING SO FUCKING HARD RIGHT NOW!!
Ahem. So. Uh. Yeah. It's a new Rez game. You can suck Ubisofts cock now. I know I am. HARD.
(If you don't know REZ, you either suck, or play too much Modern Warfare)
HE JUST KEEPS PLAYING AND PLAYING! I AM CUMMING SO HARD!
I guess it's called Child of Eden now. What a fucking way to start a show. God yes.
It can only go down from here.

At least their presenter dude isn't as horrible as the other ones. He's obviously reading from the teleprompter, but he's at least doing it with style.

Great, they're starting off with Assassin's Creed 2010. I'm sure SOMEONE still cares about this franchise, but I sure as fuck don't. Now you can play the exact same game in yet another time period? Thanks Oobisoft!

Ass is Red
[Man, you just missed it, but when he was turned around, his ass was red.]

It does look a little more interesting than Assassin's Creed 2009 though. At least now there's like knights and shit.
There's been no actual game content shown though, just a pretty neat fmv. (*Just after I typed that the gameplay demo started*) And judging by the comments on G4Tv (I had to switch because IGN's stream was fucking up) there's still 12 year olds who think this will be the BEST. GAME. EVER. Graphics appear to have been spiced up a little, but that might just be because they're playing it on a PSTripple.
The larger scale also looks nice. It's less about being an assassin and more about KICKING FUCKING ASS, apparently. Not that that's really a good thing for a series that's about stealth, but it does look nice.

Shaun White skateboarding huh? Really? Well…alright.

Shaun white
[It's called Shaun White skateboarding because he looks like Carrot Top]

I…don't think they have a lot to show us. This guy's been talking to Shaun White for like 10 minutes already, and this really isn't a very high profile game. They've stolen the classic 'the better you do, the more color returns to the world' idea, which does look nice, but we've really seen this about six times already since Okami. AND THEY DARE CALL IT INNOVATION! Motherfuckers.

So..we get a little play of random people running through the audience with Lazer Tag guns?

Charging his lazor
[Imma chargin' mah fake laugh!]

They made a game where you ACTUALLY play the game? It's basically home lazer tag, but somehow there's also a vidyagaem involved? The answer is: not really. Seriously, this could be played with normal tag guns and a DVD. It's a nice idea, but…well…not nice enough.

Wow, Ubisoft is REALLY going for the casual crowd now huh? MORE USELESS PERIPHERALS?

Gimmicks
[I wonder how much this will cost us. And how many heartbeat monitoring gimmicks we'll have in our gaming cabinet by the end of the year!]

Basically, this is Wii Fit only it's Wii Relax. It's very odd and useless, but in a very cute package. It pretty much teaches you to chill out with breathing exercises and stuff.

This guy is fucking awesome.

DAT STACHE
[Dat Stache.jpg]

And all these Frenchies have awesome accents.

Natal is sparking hundreds of insanely creepy wii-like games with people trying to make us get off the couch to play minigames. But the real question is: why would 'hardcore' gamers want to do this? Make me a game that is more than just a wagglefest and show me that this thing can do more.

I thought they might go ahead with the actual games here after so much waggle (seriously, it was over 20 minutes) but next up is another Raving Rabbits title! This time they're time traveling.

Another sequel to a rehash: it's Ghost Recon Future Soldier.

Ghost
[WHAT THE HELL IS GOING ON WITH THAT DUDE!?]

It looks kind of interesting, but I'm really getting tired of these constant modern warfare games and fucking 100 FPS games we've all already seen before getting rehashed every goddamn E3. I might actually pick this one up though, the whole future tech thing is kind of neat. I'm loving the scripted team A.I. too. And all those voices are so gruff and manly without becoming a joke like in Gears.
Actually, you know what? After watching this shit for 7 minutes: it looks awesome as fuck and I will be getting it.
There, I said it.

Oh, hey, it's the new Driver game!

Driver
[Look at all that 360 computing power]

Another franchise revived from the dusty closet, it seems. I enjoyed the first one, so this might be nice. (Cool screenshot, it shows the AWESOME GRAPHICS~!) Anyway, it's looking kind of cool, I guess, nothing too revolutionary but it'll probably be solid.

Oh fuck yes, it's the CEO of Ubisoft!
This guy has the best accent you've ever heard.
…Hey, what the crap? He's tightened up his speech! Bah. Lameness.

OH SHI- IT'S A NEW POPULOUS!

Populous
[You remember Populous, right, kid? It's that game that came with your first decent PC]

Only it's for Xbox Live so…does that mean it sucks? Or just that I will never get to play it? I am confus!

And a new Rayman game. But it's more like a flash game. Oh well, I don't really care for Rayman anyway.

MOTHER
FUCKER
A Michael Jackson dancing game?

Jacko
[Guys, I'm dead now, you can go ahead looting my corpse!]

This had better be better than Moonwalker (lol fat chance). Yves was all like: OH NIGGA DO I HAVE A GRAND FUCKING EXIT FOR YOU but it's a shitty dancing game =[
Well, anyway, dance like Mike in your own living room, I guess.

That was it for E3 today. It is now 3:35, I think I'll go to bed since I have the worst cold ever ;_;

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This entry was posted on 15 June 2010 by in Games and tagged , , , , .

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From #temples to #churches.

#church #Korea #SouthKorea #Seoul #religion #Christian #Christianity #cross #Korean #spooky #spoopy #filter #woods #교회 #무서워 #서울 #기독교 I had a great time working with #SBS on their new program #내방안내서 in the beautiful #Mihwangsa #temple. I'm sure that @zazimusic has made @haemin_sunim proud with their song based on his book, #멈추면비로소보이는것들.
며칠동안 #미황사 에서 시간을 보내는 게 큰 인상을 주었고 만난 사람들 너무 친절하게 챙겨서 감사하는 말 밖에 못 한다.
다들 #수고했어.

#Korea #SouthKorea #tv #filming #television #tvshow #Koreantv #Buddhism #Buddha #traditional #절 #불교 #텔레비전 #쇼 #촬영 #버라이어티 #발송 I came back to #Seoul yesterday. Waking up to the sound of cars passing under my window and people shouting instead of the sound of the waves rolling over the beach and bugs chirping, I realized again that a part of me hates this city, no matter how much I love it. Now I understand why #혜민스님 makes the trip back to #미황사 so often even though he lives in Seoul as well.

For people living in a big city like this, it's important to #slowdown and not get caught and lose yourself in the flow of things. Life in the #countryside and in a #temple is so different, so much more #empty, but so much more fulfilling.

#Korea #SouthKorea #Mihwangsa #color #peace #reflection #religion #Buddhism #Buddha #tranquility #traditional #절 #평화 #불교 #해남 #108배 #전통 #역사 #생각 #자성 #내이야기 #미황사 에서 사흘밖에 안 보냈는데, 그래도 #생각 을 많이 바뀌었다. #성찰 하면서 내 한국 생활도 생각하고 한국 사람들의 #촌 을 생각하면서 왜 한국이랑 사랑에 빠졌는지 다시 깨달았어요. 한국에서 사는 것이 선물이니까.. 잘 살아야지.

#절라도 #절라남도 #절 #평화 #불교 #해남 #혜민스님 #Korea #SouthKorea #Temple #Shrine #tranquility #peace #reflection #religion #Buddhism #Buddha #혜민스님 의 #미황사 에서 #멈추면비로소보이는것들 많다. #절 의 #평화 를 느끼고 마음을 비우면서 깊은 생각도 하고 한국 생활을 #감사 하는 생각도 많고.. 한국이 역시 #아름다운 나라입니다. 
Another gorgeous #sunset at #Mihwangsa #temple.
I am so thankful to #SBS and 혜민스님 for letting us stay here.
Just like the title of his book, there are many things you can only see when you #slow down. Staying at the temple and talking with the staff has taught me once again that Korea is an amazing country, and I couldn't be happier to be here. 
#nofilter #Korea #SouthKorea #island #traditional #tranquility #nature #wood #meditation Everything is more beautiful in #Jeollanamdo, even a #sunset.

#nature #Korea #SouthKorea #sea #island #절라도 #절라남도 #바다 #섬 #자연 #일몰
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